The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 5 has been a smash hit. Each of the women has made sure to show up and show out. Between Mary Cosby’s choice to speak about her son’s issues, Meredith Marks’ bat mitzvah, and Bronwyn Newport’s outing of her husband’s Starbucks collection, each episode has kept me on my toes. We are mid-season now, and this means we are not too far from the reunion special. The seating chart has been dropped, and each woman has their place. And just for good measure, 17 C is not pictured.
To the left of Andy Cohen sits a Greek goddess
I internally screamed when I saw that Angie Katsanevas had been promoted to the top seat. And by internally screamed, I mean out loud, and I startled my husband. But this is a big Bravo moment. The self-proclaimed Greek goddess has worked hard for this moment, and her placement proves that the network also values what she is bringing to the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. The seating chart tells me that the Princess of Greece has arrived. Angie has delivered consistently this season. Between telling Britani Bateman that she looks “porn-ish” with a “high body count” and telling Bronwyn to “shut the f*ck up” over a million times, Angie has made her presence known.
To be honest, Angie might have the most unresolved issues compared to the rest of the cast. Angie has upset Bronwyn to the point that the fashionista embarrassed her husband, which is a no-no. She has also made Britani out to be a bad Mormon who sleeps around. Even Meredith has had enough of Angie’s antics and is forced to kick her out of her coming-of-age celebration. But Angie rises up every time the women come for her. All I have to say is Opa! Let’s go, girl.
Whitney Rose was left out in the cold
Deep down, I know that Whitney Rose is seething at the fact that she has been sitting at the end of the couch. The mother of two has been on a journey, and to be honest, it has bored Real Housewives of Salt Lake City fans out of their gourd. I can empathize with the fact that sitting next to a first-season housewife must sting. Thinking back, I am not even sure Whit had a real storyline. She tried so hard to make Lisa’s Alibaba attack a thing, but it just fizzled out. It was nice to see her mend fences with Heather Gay, though. Personally, I like Bad Weather and think these two should be close.
Heather’s placement seems fine. I am happy with her second-chair seating. The Beauty Lab owner had a good season. She immediately clocked Bronwyn for being a troublemaker and has been a breath of fresh air with her bonding activities. Lisa Barlow and Heather’s positive friendship has been the talk of the town this season, so it makes sense that the two new besties would be placed side by side. If anything, this tells me Lisa and Heather are still very much in their honeymoon phase.
Lisa Barlow is a strategic placement
I can’t help but feel that Lisa was strategically placed to Andy Cohen’s right so that the host could keep track of her. Lisa has a habit of getting fired up and over-talking. I can picture it now. Andy will try to placate the Vida Tequila owner like a teacher does with their students. The mother of two might think her up close and personal seat is because she is Andy’s favorite, but we know better. Odds are good we will hear Andy say, “You’re my special helper.” I just hope he has wet wipes to ensure her Cheeto hands don’t stain the furniture.
Meredith in seat three is a choice. But I hear the network’s motive loud and clear. I loved Mer in Season 1. But gradually, over each season, she has worn me down. I feel the fame has gone to her head, and her outbursts like “You can leave” never felt like a genuine representation of her as a person. Until her bat mitzvah, Meredith has been relatively quiet and hasn’t delivered a rousing performance. But we have the second half of the season left, so things could change.
I couldn’t care less where Britani sat and was surprised she wasn’t given a Traci Barber folding chair if Jared Osmond wasn’t invited.
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City airs on Bravo on Wednesdays.
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