Welcome to the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 4, Episode 14 recap. In this week’s episode, “Bermuda Birthday Blues,” it’s Monica’s birthday and Heather crowns her “Queen for a Day.” But an unexpected change of plans turns into a heartbreaking disappointment. Gossip is making the rounds that Angie’s a member of the Greek Mafia, but could the source be someone they know? All Hell breaks loose at Monica’s birthday dinner, as Angie confronts Meredith. Here are the highlights of RHOSLC Season 4, Episode 14.
All hail Queen Monica
Over a traditional Bermudan breakfast, Heather crowns Monica “Queen for a Day.” She presents her with “a special crown, a scepter, and a queen’s robe.” Monica’s really touched, especially since she’s in such a tough place right now with her mom.
Monica’s so excited to be in Bermuda. Her extended family is from there and later today, she’s going to get to spend some time with them. She’s very excited about seeing her family members she hasn’t seen in 30 years.
A couple of weeks ago, Monica was supposed to go to therapy with her mom – at Linda’s request. Monica didn’t even want to go but told her mom she’d be there. She was willing to try. But Linda never showed up. That’s pretty f*cked up. It was Linda’s idea for them to go together in the first place, and she just blew it off. That’s just sad.
But Monica has heard from her Bermudan family that Linda’s been saying she wants to “show up and surprise Monica for her birthday.” She can fly to Bermuda for her daughter’s birthday, but she can’t make a therapy appointment? Linda wants to be seen as a caring mom, but she won’t “do the work.”
Is Angie in the Greek Mafia?
After breakfast, Monica calls Lisa up to her balcony for a chat. She’s nervous about meeting her family after so many years. She doesn’t want to go by herself and asks Lisa if she’ll come with her. Lisa’s flattered and touched that Monica would ask her and says, of course, she’ll come. She’d love to meet Monica’s family.
But then Monica brings up her talk with Meredith the night before. Meredith suspects that Angie’s in the “Greek Mafia.”
Lisa says, “Oh, my God, are you crazy? That is nuts!”
Monica tells her about the DMs she’s been getting on her Instagram about Angie, including legal documents pertaining to tax liens and bankruptcies. She also says that Meredith said she was getting the same ones.
Lisa doesn’t believe it for a minute. She thinks Meredith’s just trying to damage Angie’s reputation. It’s the same thing she did last year with Lisa’s SEC filing. Lisa thinks Meredith’s using Monica to do her dirty work.
A crushing disappointment
First on the birthday agenda: jet skis! They fly across the water, over the top of sunken wrecks. They feed bread to the fish. Frozen veggies are much better for feeding fish. Frozen peas are the best.
Afterward, everyone returns to the van. As they find their seats, Monica looks at her phone. Suddenly she jumps off the van and bursts into tears. Lisa follows her.
“Wait, what just happened?” Meredith wants to know.
Crying hysterically, Monica tells Lisa, “My mom just made my family not meet me.”
“Why?!” Lisa asks. “Oh, my God, I’m so sorry … Why would she do this to you?” Monica’s crying made me teary. I’m a sympathetic crier.
Sobbing, Monica says, “I can’t breathe.” She got a text that her Bermudan family no longer wanted to see her.
“I can’t help but think that my mom was somehow involved,” Monica confesses. “I know that she wanted to be here, and I know that she’s upset that she’s not.”
As self-absorbed as Lisa usually seems, she’s very sweet with Monica. To calm her down, Lisa keeps repeating, “You’re fine, you’re fine.”
In voiceover, Monica adds, “I was so excited to see my family … and hear stories about my grandma. I feel like if my mom can hurt me, she will … I feel so alone.”
Once Monica’s composed herself, they return to the Sprinter van. I feel so sad for Monica. I can’t imagine having a mother who would cause her child so much pain.
When they get back, everyone wants to know what happened, but Monica can’t even speak about it without crying again. So Lisa explains what happened. Seriously, you guys, I’m crying for Monica right now.
Birthday beach time
At the beach, there are six chairs set up and lunch is ready. They have champagne and Bermudan fish sandwiches.
Lisa and Angie go for a walk down the beach. Lisa tells the salon owner that Meredith thinks she’s in the Greek Mafia. She repeats all the information Monica gave her this morning.
Angie is stunned speechless. If I were in her shoes, that would not be my reaction at all. I would seriously fall down laughing. She calls Meredith a “Phoney F*cking Baloney Fraud.”
“Come on, my little gangster,” Lisa says, as they stroll back to the group.
Monica’s pirate-themed birthday dinner
For Monica’s birthday dinner, everyone dresses up as a pirate. Except for prissy Lisa who won’t wear a costume unless it’s Chanel or Versace. The restaurant is in an actual cave with stalactites and stalagmites! It’s amazing!
Once the cocktails are ordered, Monica wants to know when was the last time everybody had sex. She thinks she’s being open about sex, but a lot of us prefer to keep our private life private.
Heather agrees with me on this subject and refuses to talk about it. When Monica presses her, Heather pulls the STFU card. Sometimes that card comes in handy.
“We should not play games anymore,” Whitney wisely observes.
But before the appetizers even arrive, Angie confronts Meredith about accusing her of being in the Greek Mafia. Meredith claims she never said that. Oh, yes, she did! That’s exactly what she told Monica, and we all saw it on TV.
Of course, a fight ensues and I’m not even going to recap it ’cause it’s just like every other fight. They never settle anything. Can these women never just go somewhere and have a nice time?
“Meredith just doesn’t get that we’re onto [her],” Lisa comments. “It doesn’t take Inspector Gadget to figure out what you’re doing. She doesn’t have superpowers, she can’t just make this go away. You’re guilty.”
“Meredith has a very sophisticated game of pot-stirring,” Heather says. I blame it on too much time in the bathtub. I’m just glad these pirates didn’t have swords.
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City continues Tuesdays at 8/7c on Bravo.
TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF REAL HOUSEWIVES OF SALT LAKE CITY SEASON 4, EPISODE 14? DID YOU FEEL SORRY FOR MONICA? DO YOU THINK ANGIE’S REALLY IN THE GREEK MAFIA?
