Rachel ‘Raquel’ Leviss has finally broken her silence, since going under the radar after filming the Vanderpump Rules Season 10 reunion. Spending 90 days in a mental health facility, Rachel now feels ready to speak out about her experience. Perhaps shockingly to some, she has chosen to do that as part of Bethenny Frankel’s podcast. Here’s everything she had to say, about trying to be a better person, going back to her real name, and reintroducing herself to the world.
Bethenny asks Rachel how she’s doing
After a deep sigh, Rachel said she was “hanging in there.”
“It’s been a whirlwind. It’s been chaos. But I’ve taken some time to myself to reflect, and try to understand my actions and I finally have come to the place where it makes sense to me.”
Rachel continued: “Part of the reason why I wanted to take some time away was just because it was so chaotic and loud, and there was such vitriol online. But then the other part of the reason why I wanted to go to a treatment facility was to understand my behaviors, and my goal was to really get down to the bottom of, ‘Okay, why am I choosing men that are unavailable? Why do I keep finding myself in unhealthy relationships? What are the things that I need to change about my behavior?’ And in knowing that I needed to make a change, I first had to know what it was that leads to those behaviors.”
For some time, Rachel thought she “was going crazy.” But in speaking to Bethenny, and in receiving treatment, she recognized just how blown out of proportion the events of a reality TV show can become.
“It is contrived to create a certain storyline, and so it’s not all factual,” she said of her experience. “So as a viewer tuning in, it’s easy to get wrapped up in that, and then the concept of an affair hits really hard to a lot of people. So I think there was a lot of projection happening. A lot of emotions came up for people. Unfortunately, I was the punching bag for a lot of that.”
Can Rachel take responsibility?
While this may all sound like an excuse, from someone incapable of taking responsibility, Rachel wanted to do that as well.
She explained: “I do wanna take a moment though to just acknowledge the hurt that I’ve brought to a lot of people. I was not careful in my actions and I was not thinking long-term. I was completely wrapped up in heartbreak and wanting to get certain needs met. Looking back now, I can see that I was still healing from a relationship from somebody who I thought I was going to marry, and in ending that I still haven’t healed yet. So when I was filming, I was drinking a lot to ease that anxiety, and in a reality TV environment, I wasn’t getting that safe space for me to express my emotions in a healthy way.”
Bethenny asked, “How does it feel to be able to just tell your story with your own voice right now?”
Oh my gosh, it feels like I have this opportunity to share how much I’ve grown, and how hard I’m trying to be a better person,” Rachel responded. “That person that I saw watching back on my TV was someone who’s completely out of character from who I truly am. And so, I feel like having this opportunity to share my side of the story and to represent myself in a way that I feel like is true to who I am, is all I could ever ask for.”
TELL US – ARE YOU READY TO MOVE ON FROM SCANDOVAL? WAS THE PUMP RULES DRAMA BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION? DO YOU BELIEVE RACHEL IS TRYING TO BE BETTER?
